Wednesday, 5 October 2011

Rice is nice

If there is anything as satisfying as rice pudding, I haven't met him yet.
There are cool drinks on hot summer days, turkey gravy on mashed potatoes and rice pudding in that order of highly satisfying food to dine on.

I used to belong to a fringe group of people who baked their rice pudding, same basic ingredients but blapped into the oven for hours and hours only to get sweet golden baked rice. In the words of so many stereotypical movie side kicks...
"Oh no you didn't"
So no, I don't,
bake rice pudding anymore - it's nothin’ but stovetop for me.

This is the only recipe I've ever purposely used raisins. 
Little know fact: Raisins remain the most unholy of all the dried shrivel fruits,  Eve didn't offer Adam an apple, she offered him a box of raisins. A millennium of re-editing the bible turned the raisins to an apple, but sure as you are reading this blog, the Devil had a "fun sized" box of Sunmaid raisins ready for unsuspecting souls. Why do you think adults hand them to children at Halloween?? They're the food of the devil; adults just follow the tradition of trying to corrupt the innocent through the power of the wrinkly grape.   All true.
"Hey Adam, you wanna box of raisins?"

In this recipe you'll learn the awesome power of rice to counteract the evil lurking in the raisin, just don't deviate...unless you feel lucky punk, well, do ya?

  • 1 c. short grain white rice
  • 1/4 c. sugar or sweet stuff of your choice
  • 2 c. water
  • 2 c. milk or milk substitute
  • 1/2 c. raisins
  • Vanilla, extract (ghetto) or 1 scraped bean pod (gourmet) it's up to you
  • 1/4 c. coconut water, milk or cream

Place the first 5 ingredients in a saucepan EXCEPT the vanilla extract and coconut
Say some prayers to the gods of good will asking they protect you from the evils evoked when you pulled out the raisins.
Turn that pan right up and get a boil started - stir often and do not scold the milk...seriously it's sensitive. 
Turn the heat to a low temp and feel free to stir the pudding frequently, remember we're making a pudding so whip those starches up.
When you think it's about done, that's when you introduce the vanilla and coconut. Coconut? But why? It's in ambrosia, ambrosia is the foods of the gods, ergo, and it’ll counter balance the evil raisins.

Remember to hold off to allow this puddin’ to cool before performing a triple twisting double pike in, a direct hit of rice puddin’ immediately after cooking with burn you taste buds off. Take a break; relax and the world will be your pudding.

Eat, in good taste.

It's not easy being green

Too many heads of iceberg lettuce out there blanding the whole world up with their tastelessness. If your in the grocer and your buying iceberg, please for the love of sweet bearded baby Jesus remember this ...
                    you CAN buy good taste.

There is no reason for this leafy treason, it's time to be introduced to the new green in town. Time to give up on the regular leafy ho hum, and approach the greens as an experiment in developing new flavors and combinations. Salads, cole slaws and fresh veggies platter can all be better when your try something new.
Here's a simple chart to help you start your picking, of greens…I don’t even what to think about what else your picking sitting in front of your computer, alone, without anyone watching …ewwwwww.  

Black Kale
Brassica-spinach x brocolli
Dark purple to blue often dusty looking
Red Cabbage
X-crunchy slightly sweet, brassica finish
Dark purple, sometimes shiny and sometimes dusty
Bitter & Herby
Dark purple and white, shiny
Beet Greens
mild beet root flavor with boost of grassy
Shiny green and deep purple, stems are deep ruby red leading to red veining.
Green Kale
Like seaweed without that ocean flavor
deep green/blue, should be even in tone. May even look dusty
fresh green grass – cud
shiny vibrant green
Arugula or Rocket
Green + pepper or horse radish
shiny vibrant green
Swiss Chard
green and earthy – same taste regardless of stem colour
leaf is shiny green, stems range in colour form white, yellow orange and red
green and bitter
vibrant green, pale green and white stems
Horseradish and greens
less vibrant green than above, but still grass green
Greens and celery – crispy
Shiny vibrant green and white stems, paler as the leaves go into the centre
Butter Lettuce
tender fresh green, mild
Shiny vibrant pale green
Green Cabbage
so many varities!
mild broccoli lots of crunch
Variable from emerald to pale green to white
mildly bitter
variable dependent of light source white to pale yellow and tinted green
Sprouted Seeds
mild and crunchy
variable dependent of light source white to pale yellow and tinted green
mildly bitter
White to pale green

Time to go out and turn over a new leaf.